Break Through Deadlock with Information Exchange

As you probe for information while negotiating, listen intelligently to what your counterpart says. What they disclose to you are the conditions for your deal. They’re revealing their interests and the reasons behind their positions. They’re explaining what they have for you and what they want from you.

To obtain as much information as possible, remember to give a little back. Information exchange is a negotiation taking place within the negotiation. You probe to get what you want, and your counterpart gives something up. You probe to get more, and this time your counterpart hesitates. Why? Because now it’s your turn. Remember, your counterpart will only keep talking if you offer something back. Share something. Give them what you’d like them to know. Then ask them another question.

Probing only works if negotiation is two-sided. Your ability to offer a little and probe some more keeps the discussion moving.

But now, let’s imagine a worst-case negotiating scenario. You’ve already exhausted your questions and your silence is met with equal silence from your counterpart. Information is not forthcoming; no one is negotiating. You have reached a deadlock.

Deadlock seems to happen when you cannot agree, but this is not true. Deadlock happens because you cannot reach an agreement. Note the difference, you can agree. But, how can you reach an agreement if you aren’t discussing anything? To keep negotiations moving, you’ve got to jumpstart the talk.

So, what to do? Simply this. Use your imagination. Create a scenario. Deploy the most powerful two-letter word in your negotiating vocabulary. It’s not “NO”, it’s “IF”.

IF helps you test the waters in a negotiation without either side making a commitment. IF creates a hypothetical situation that you and your counterpart can imagine and evaluate without actually having to do anything.

Here’s how it works. Suppose you’re deadlocked. Create a scenario that your counterpart may respond to, like this: “Let’s just suppose. If I do allow you 60 days credit on the balance, would you raise your deposit to 25%?” And your counterpart might reply saying, “Well, no. If I give you 25%, I want 90 days.” Evaluate their counteroffer, then proceed, either with a probe or with another offer. Information is exchanged, positions are revealed. IF gets negotiations moving again.

And there’s no need for you to be IFfy all the time. Phrases like “let’s pretend”, “just suppose” and “let’s imagine” will work just as well. Being hypothetical will help you break deadlock and propel negotiations forward.