How Assertive Are You?

Picture this.  Two standby ticket counters are open at KLIA, but the lines are fairly long and everyone feels like they’ve been waiting a long time.  You’re next to being served in your line.  But, just as the person in front of you leaves the counter, a man wearing sunglasses and a black business suit carrying a black leather brief case cuts to the front of the line and, without acknowledging you, places his ticket on the counter.

Now, what are you going to do?  Are you going to say something to him, or are you going to let him go?

There’s a lot to consider here.  On one hand, you’ve been waiting in line a long time and so has everyone else.  This man is infringing upon everyone’s rights, and as the next person in line, the default advocate for everyone else is you.  So maybe you ought to go say something to him.

On the other hand, this guy looks dangerous.  He might be somebody.  What would he say back to you if you were to step up to him?  He’s probably got a legitimate reason for immediate service.  Maybe he’s somebody’s bodyguard.  In fact, he probably works for the airline.  Better to just let him go.

What’s coming into question here is your level of assertiveness. 

Assertiveness is an attitude or behavior that that allows you to stand up for your rights without infringing upon the rights of others.  Non-assertive people may be passive or, the other extreme, aggressive.  Passive people will simply allow the man in black to go.  Aggressive people… well, they are the men in black.

As an assertive person, you recognize that everyone has rights – not only legal rights, but rights to individuality, to personal preferences, feelings and opinions.  You are committed to preserving those rights for everyone.  Your assertive behaviors are intended to promote communication and problem solving and you can deploy a variety of different behaviors depending on the situation.

Assertiveness skills are essential for business success.  The higher you move in your organization, the more you become dependent upon them.  Assertiveness skills enable you to uphold unpopular management decisions, put forth and take credit for brilliant ideas, and work out agreeable terms with the toughest negotiators.  Corporate captains do not reach their positions with passive behavior.

When you speak to the man in black about taking his proper place in line, whose side is everyone else in line going to take, yours or his?  In your efforts to stand up for your rights and the rights of others, assertive behavior is a quality that everyone admires.